Comments on Terry's Friend Harry: A Brand You Can Trust [FICTION]

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2017-07-23T17:49:44.908-07:00

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Im not even sure how I got here but I love reading...

2017-01-23T21:48:05.732-08:00

Im not even sure how I got here but I love reading your writing. Even the one about the subs. You definitely have a gift, especially for someone so young. I think there's a second part to this story which I can't wait to read. Thanks for sharing.

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2016-08-26T19:36:09.362-07:00

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No apologies necessary man. I really wish more peo...

2016-08-10T20:37:14.867-07:00

No apologies necessary man. I really wish more people would leave me detailed comments like this! I will definitely take your suggestions, especially with descriptive detail.

I'm in the midst of writing the follow-up to this right now and I think a lot of the questions you have are gonna be at least addressed (if not answered outright) as I flesh this out. I'm glad you enjoyed it and thanks again for the suggestions.

Following me on twitter is probably the easiest wa...

2016-08-10T20:33:01.686-07:00

Following me on twitter is probably the easiest way. My twitter name is @TerrysFriendH but if you don't have twitter I think I have one more slot on my mailing list open (they only let you have 10 people) so if you send me your email at TerrysFriendHarry@gmail.com I can probably fit you in. Thanks for reading!

Great writing! I really enjoyed the reverse struct...

2016-08-10T14:24:56.988-07:00

Great writing! I really enjoyed the reverse structure. The way you introduced the characters, especially Adam, created a lot of suspense and intrigue. We can tell that he is new to this lifestyle and in over his head, which sets the stage for a lot of character development later on. You could take this story a MILLION different directions right now, and we have no idea where it will go. You've got options, which is great.

I think in general, you use a lot of descriptive detail, but I wouldn't mind even more at points, especially if you plan on developing this into a series or novel. For example, for someone not used to the festival scene, what is the campground setting like? What are characters seeing/feeling/hearing/experiencing, etc. Little details like this can take a story from being pretty engaging to completely immersive, and make the story accessible to a wider audience.

There are so many questions I want answered right now:

I wonder if the victims have friends/acquaintances at the festival who saw something suspicious.....

Where did the main characters slip up? I'm sure they left a trace somewhere at Jam Camp.

Will Jam Camp workers REALLY protect the Family when facing questioning from local authorities or FBI?

How much will Connor's drinking become a liability later on?

How dangerous/wild/unpredictable is the Family ring leader. I'm sure he's done some crazy shit to get to the top of the drug game......

How deep does this Family run? Has Adam made a lifetime commitment he wasn't ready for?

I think the real challenge will be developing these nuances from Adam's POV in a linear manner.

Anyway, sorry for the super-lengthy comment! I hope you find at least some of this helpful.

Keep it up: I look forward to reading the next installment

Cheers,
John

Fantastic storytelling and interesting characters,...

2016-08-04T09:21:07.012-07:00

Fantastic storytelling and interesting characters, keep it up!

I thought the characters were really fleshed out a...

2016-08-04T01:15:56.371-07:00

I thought the characters were really fleshed out and it was engaging. also, fan theory: m Adam is an undercover cop trying to infiltrate the Family. Keep writing! I love your stuff

I like this a lot, but I also like NN&N. Keep ...

2016-08-04T01:14:29.731-07:00

I like this a lot, but I also like NN&N. Keep up the good work!

Awesome story! Great read, defenitely would like t...

2016-08-03T21:01:01.394-07:00

Awesome story! Great read, defenitely would like to read more. Also, is there a way know when you write new stories? I found out about this through a comment of yours in reddit

Yeah i would keep expanding on the idea. Its going...

2016-08-03T18:58:56.775-07:00

Yeah i would keep expanding on the idea. Its going really well i think! good work man

very good, let's see more!

2016-08-03T11:33:07.317-07:00

very good, let's see more!

yoo was super good mate, would definitely like to ...

2016-08-03T08:42:04.320-07:00

yoo was super good mate, would definitely like to see it expanded on !